Nicole's Engl blog

What Worries me about Engl

Posted on: September 8, 2012

What worries me about Engl 3p90 is the fact that I haven’t done any writing that isn’t scholarly or academic in some form since my elementary school days. I feel that creative writing lost its place in the curriculum after that and while I enjoyed it I was never astonishingly good at it and therefore never pursued it on my own. Since I’m out of practice I have no idea what kind of crazy or dull thoughts are going to come spilling out my head onto the paper. Because I haven’t done writing of this sort in a while and I feel out of practice having others read my work and critique it terrifies me, you always have those few in the class that are so gifted at what ever it is that your doing. And while these prompts only require ten minutes of your time some people I’m sure some will produce great genius in those ten minutes while I’m unsure of what I am capable of in ten minutes. It’s these talented people whose opinions of my work scare me the most as my writing will be far below theirs and that is the comparison I feel many people in this class will make. The other thing that scares me about having others critique my work is knowing that many of the critiquers are my friends or even colleagues in many of my other classes as well. Will they forever remember me by the piece I wrote in only ten minutes and the criticism that was given about it. Will I say something to personal that will for ever mark me to them as “that girl”?

I think I am comfortable with delving into my life for material and I think in a sense it might be almost therapeutic and good for me. I am a very open person often I’m willing to share any aspect of my life if someone asked me to. But as I’m sure with other people there are some topics that make me uncomfortable or that bring up bad memories, if those come up in my writing, it will be a challenge for sure maybe not one that worries me too much but I see as almost an excitement at how it will challenge me as a person. I think the thing that worries me also is having people read my work that know me the best  maybe that piece of writing will change the way they view me, for better or worse or maybe it will help them better understand me, regardless it could change that static opinion that person has of me. I think what worries me the most really is the uncertainty, uncertainty in my writing abilities, the experiences I have lived being useful and inspiring enough for me to pull from, and the uncertainty of the level of writing other will produce and then how they will respond to my writing of these I am very uncertain.

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